CAN WE FINALLY TALK ABOUT THE SUPER BOWL?
 
Yes, we'll finally do it.
 
Now that the hoo-hah has died down; 
Now that my die-hard Philly fan of a wife has been in an Eagles victory parade down Park City's Main Street with eight other cockeyed optimists in green jerseysand been covered in the local paper; 
Now that the Valentine's Day launch of CoupleCo: Working With Your Spouse For Fun & Profit has happened and you may or may not have paid attention to it (here's the link: https://tinyurl.com/y73nu26g); 
We can finally talk about the commercials.
 
And we're going to talk about what should be your personal favorite, even though it's probably not.
 
 
BUT FIRST, A DISCLAIMER
 
I know that it was also the favorite of Wizard of Ads partner Jeff Sexton, a brilliant copywriter the hem of whose garment I am unworthy to kiss.
 
I know Mr. Sexton has already opined upon this commercial.
 
I, however, have not yet read his missive.
 
I did not wish to be influenced, in whole or in part, by his writing.
 
So everything here is on me. We are not cribbing notes from his screed. (Though, that could be difficult. His screed is generally much more polite than my own.)
 
Anyway.
 
Here it comes:
 
One commercial.
 
Thirty words of announcer copy.
 
One single, 40-second take.
 
 
OPEN ON A LONG SHOT ACROSS A RIVER
 
Coming through tall, dry grass is a red Jeep.
 
The Jeep plunges over the river bank and into the water.
 
Announcer: "How many car ads have you seen with grandiose speeches over the years?"
 
There's a big a splash as the Jeep barrels through the river towards the camera, water up to the bumper.
 
Announcer: "Big declarations making claims to some overarching human truth."
 
The Jeep passes by the camera and heads towards a waterfall. It surges up a rock ledge.
 
Announcer: "Companies call these commercials manifestos."
 
The Jeep aims towards the cascading waters. It bounces across a series of rocks, climbs up the waterfall, and barrels away.
 
Announcer: "There's your manifesto."
 
Graphic: "The all-new 2018 Wrangler." Graphic fades to: "Jeep."
 
 
THE SIMPLICITY AND ELEGANCE OF THIS MESSAGE DEFIES SUPER BOWL MADNESS
 
It's been a long time since Super-Bowl-commercial mania dished out anything this refined.
 
It also belies a deep emotional charge that fuels the purchase of vehicles like Jeep.
 
And there's the fact that weeks after seeing this message just one time in a crowded, noisy room, it still resonates.
 
It may not resonate for you.
 
Speaking personally, my wife and I live 5 miles up a rutted dirt road with over a thousand feet of elevation gain.
 
We live a different kind of Jeep lifestyle.
 
Jeep is relevant to us. We owned a Wrangler for a while.
 
 
WE PRESENTLY OWN A 19-YEAR OLD JEEP CHEROKEE
 
That vehicle is a beast.
 
It, too, is red.
 
And it could have easily followed that all-new 2018 Wrangler up that waterfall.
 
And laughed. Ha!
 
This Jeep commercial is one of the oldest, most time-tested ways of advertising: The product demonstration.
 
It cuts, it chops, it dices, it slices, it gets out blood stains, it'll blend a Justin Bieber CD, an iPhone and a wooden rake handle, it even starts a car that's been left parked in zero-degree weather overnight with the lights on.
 
 
PRODUCT DEMONSTRATION IS NOT HIP, IT'S NOT COOL, IT DOESN'T WIN A CANNES GOLD LION
 
But it's arguable that this product demonstration breaks the mold enough that it could win all kinds of awards.
 
Because it is smart, refined, and has attitude up the wazoo.
 
"Hey, buddy. Ya know all the pretense that car makers love to throw atcha? We have no pretense. We just quietly kick ass. So there."
 
However...
 
That Jeep commercial isn't really aimed at me or at the Fabulous Honey Parker, or at anyone else who lives a Jeep lifestyle.
 
People with an actual need for high-clearance, 4WD vehicles already know Jeep. They love it or they don't.
 
 
YES, WE ALL APPRECIATE THE BEAUTY OF THE PRODUCT DEMONSTRATION
 
But there's more at work here.
 
Brand is the one way the core customer should feel about the product.
 
And in this case, a company sold just shy of a million vehicles in North America in 2016 to almost nobody who needs to drive up a waterfall.
 
They mainly don't even need to drive five miles up a rutted dirt road.
 
You know where they need to drive? The supermarket. School. The office.
 
But all those Jeeps get bought because people feel like they're buying the power to control.
 
 
AND IN A TIME WHEN THE WORLD SEEMS OUT OF CONTROL?
 
The feeling of control is a powerful thing to be selling.
 
Moreover, in an overcrowded advertising environment, saturated with big and dramatic commercial productions that come at you throwing down rhymes and riding horses and breathing fire and kicking ass and taking names...
 
The ability to be heard above the mayhem...
 
With the power of a whisper...
 
Is a glorious thing.
 
It's too soon to know how well the Jeep commercial will do.
 
And this one message is a tiny part of a huge advertising machine.
 
Jeep has such an enormous product line, we may never know.
 
 
BUT HERE'S WHAT WE CAN TAKE AWAY...
 
It is mighty.
 
It makes a statement.
 
And it does so without pyrotechnics.
 
It takes an unsexy technique like product demonstration and gives it wings.
 
Or, rather, big tires.
 
And those qualities are available to any and all of us who have to create advertising on a micro-budget.
 
What we lack in budget, we get to make up for with talent and finesse.
 
Those two qualities can make even the smallest ad really, really big.
 
If you haven't yet been to iTunes for the CoupleCo podcast, it's filled with laughs, insights, and couples who are crushing it in business without crushing each other.  Here's the link:

https://tinyurl.com/y73nu26g

As always,

Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

WOULD YOU BE WILLING TO PUT IT ALL ON THE LINE AND WORK WITHOUT A NET?
 
Your business.
 
Your marriage.
 
Your life together.
 
Working with your spouse could be a make or break undertaking, fraught with peril--or possibly filled with reward.
 
Yes, my loyal friend, it's really happening.
 
For the last year or so, you've occasionally heard that the Fabulous Honey Parker and I are working on a project called CoupleCo.
 
In our business, we frequently find ourselves working with or otherwise surrounded by couple entrepreneurs who are shaking it up and making stuff happen in the 21st century.
 
And this project called CoupleCo is starting life as interviews with such couples in a podcast called, CoupleCo: Working With Your Spouse For Fun & Profit.
 
And, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, this nutty little project goes live tomorrow: Valentine's Day, 2018.
 
 
WE'RE KICKING OFF THE FUN BY FOCUSING ON ANOTHER HUSBAND & WIFE ADVERTISING AGENCY
 
Long before Slow Burn Marketing was born on a defensible ridge at 8,000 feet elevation outside beautiful Park City, Utah, there was Whitney Advertising.
 
With big ad-agency chops from their careers in New York and Los Angeles, Jim & Robin Whitney have spent 20 years plying their trade in Park City.
 
Yes, 20 years ago, back in the dial-up '90s, the Whitneys left the big city and moved to a dinky little town in Utah and opened an ad agency.
 
Park City has a population of 7,000.
 
They moved here because this is where Jim comes from.
 
They could have moved to where Robin came from: Cleveland.
 
 
A CITY OF 400,000 WOULD'VE PROVIDED A LOT MORE BUSINESS
 
But, they instead chose a little town surrounded by ski resorts and cows. (Yes, there are cows. Many of them graze on land that is luxury-resort adjacent.)
 
The Whitney's story is interesting, engaging, and a lot of fun--augmented by the fact that Robin Whitney is adorable and often speaks in sound bites. Jim is the handsome, low-key one who lays in wait. 
 
Together, they bring a lot of heart, laughter and insight.
 
But wait, there's more.
 
Because it doesn't stop there.
 
The first two episodes are the Whitneys.
 
Then, there's a couple who were profiled here in the screed back in November: Crystal and Ryan Waugh of Waugh Family Wines.
 
 
WE INTERVIEW THEM IN THEIR WINE CAVE IN SODA CANYON
 
Their winery narrowly escaped the devastation of the Napa Valley fires, and they were good enough to take us into the cave at their winery, serve samples of their  wines, and talk about the synergy that catapulted Ryan's micro-winery business--which began in a rented garage--into a micro-empire of in-demand and hard-to-get product sold to a nationwide customer base that is much like an extended family.
 
The Waughs appear in episodes three and four.
 
And then, for the third couple, it's back to Park City for an in-depth discussion with Trish and Jared McMillen of McMillen Galleries.
 
The McMillens used to be commercial photographers together in Vegas before moving to Park City and shifting their business model: they are now fine-art photographers.
 
When you consider the creative egos involved in a pursuit like shooting landscapes with a large-format view camera and turning them into enormous, wall-filling works of art, you have to ask yourself: How on earth can two artists work together as one? How do they not kill each other? How do they not have a marriage counselor on staff?
 
 
BUT THEY DO IT-AND THE RESULTS ARE STUNNING
 
You'll hear them talking about how they built this business using a style of creative cooperation that is useful not only for any married couple, but for any two people required to cooperate in a creative undertaking.
 
And, of course, as with Whitney and Waugh, there are plenty of laughs.
 
Every one of these interviews comes with a degree of fun and love that is refreshing and revealing.
 
These are passionate people who have merged their marriages and their businesses, meeting life on their own terms, and they are crushing it.

MARRIED OR NOT, YOU CAN BE A PART OF IT
 
Here at the screed, we rarely self-indulge in shameless plugs. 

This is one of those times. Lucky you. 
 
The goal here is to launch the podcast into the New & Noteworthy section of iTunes.
 
And the way that happens is when someone like you goes to iTunes and subscribes to the podcast.
 
Yes, the podcast is free, but you do need an iTunes account. If you did not know, you do not need an Apple device to have an iTunes account. iTunes also runs on Windows.
 
But why would you want to this?
 
Well, other than doing a small favor for your relentless screedmeister here, these first three interviews comprising the first six episodes of CoupleCo: Working With Your Spouse For Fun & Profit could be really interesting for you.
 
 
THE PODCAST OFFICIALLY LAUNCHES TOMORROW, VALENTINE'S DAY 2018
 
Symbolic, eh? 
You'll be getting a link in a special, Valentine's Day email tomorrow.
 
But why are we even doing this, and why iTunes?
 
We're doing this because it's a labor of love, and this is a market that is vastly underserved. There just aren't a lot resources available to folks who are willing to put their businesses and their marriages on the line in order to create a life that's the way they want it to be.
 
And iTunes is one of the easiest ways to reach people.
 
So, whether you're in business with your significant other or not, whether or not you plan to take your partner onto the wire without a net, join us for the fun.
 
Or just download it and pretend you listened. We won't check up on you. But we will be eternally grateful. 
As always,

Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

DID I GET IT WRONG LAST TIME?
 
If you were paying attention to the last screed, we left halfway into answering a question from Chris Pollard, champion radio creative director in Ontario, to wit: "How do we move the needle?"
 
He's asking how to get affordable training for the people on his staff so they can create better radio advertising.
 
One of the first things I said was: Even if you don't care about radio, stick around. This is going to be worth it.
 
And I still stand by that. Thank you for being here.
 
However, last time, my first recommendation to anyone wanting to create better advertising was to become a geek for advertising.
 
It doesn't matter what kind of advertising you do, you need to understand techniques and history.
 
 
DID I JUMP THE GUN?
 
In preparing for this follow up, I realized: Uh-oh.
 
Did your relentless scribe put the cart before the horse?
 
Last week, I invoked the name of the father of Guerrilla Marketing, the late, great Jay Conrad Levinson. Back in the day, he had the good fortune to be hired and then fortuitously fired by Howard Gossage, the brilliant eccentric and marvelously creative ad man who ruled advertising from atop a converted firehouse in San Francisco during the '60s.
 
The delightful quirk that drove so much of Mr. Gossage's work no doubt rubbed off on Mr. Levinson, who offers a directive in his bible of guerilla marketing.
 
And that directive is blindingly important in this whole question of how to create better advertising.
 
He said, "Get people's attention."
 
 
WELL, DUH. OF COURSE YOU WANT TO GET PEOPLE'S ATTENTION.
 
But wait there's more.
 
He went on to say something that so many people creating advertising never stop to consider.
 
"People do not pay attention to advertising."
 
What?!
 
Eegad!
 
Blasephemy!
 
People do not pay attention to advertising?! Why should they not be interested in the brilliant words that come streaming forth from my word processor!
 
Why not, indeed. As Mr. Levinson continues, "...they pay attention only to things that interest them. Sometimes, people find those things in advertising."
 
Getting their attention does not mean yelling, "Free beer!" And then saying, "Now that I have your attention, I'm selling this horse."  
 
It means something else.
 
 
"TO BE INTERESTING, BE INTERESTED."
 
No, that is not Mr. Levinson speaking.
 
Nor is it David Ogilvy, as the internet meme machine would like you to believe. I can guarantee this, because the quote appears two thirds of the way down page 88 of that grand old chestnut of persuasion, How To Win Friends And Influence Peopleby Dale Carnegie.
 
If people pay attention to what interests them, and you wish them to pay attention to your advertising, it becomes necessary that your advertising is interesting.
 
And this takes us to a very basic element of writing great advertising.
 
It's not about advertising.
 
 
IT'S ABOUT PEOPLE
 
And this is where we should've begun the discussion.
 
Not at becoming a geek for advertising.
 
But at becoming a geek for life, the universe and everything.
 
Anyone can explain the basic mechanics of creating an advertisement.
 
But what can't be taught is a curiosity about the world outside the advertisement.
 
And that's something you find in all the great advertising writers who have come down the pike.
 
To a person, they are interesting--but more importantly, they are interested.
 
And I guarantee you that when Mr. Pollard in his office in his radio station in Dryden in Ontario in Canada at the top side of North America hears this, he's going to wonder what the heck has happened.
 
 
ALL THIS MAN WANTED WAS ADVICE ON RADIO TRAINING
 
He's received commentary on advertising geekdom, is now being told that an interest in life, the universe and everything is really what every writer needs, and what on earth is he supposed to do with that?
 
I feel your pain, Mr. Pollard. It's frustrating for me, too.
 
Don't worry, we will get back on topic.
 
But first, we need to beat this mule some more.
 
Too much thinking in business (and in life) is channeled and labeled and siloed and stratified and packaged and otherwise rigidly defined.
 
There is no room for anything that isn't categorized.
 
 
EVERYONE WANTS WELL-DEFINED ANSWERS AND SOLUTIONS
 
Understandably.
 
Here's the problem with talking about training people to create better advertising.
 
There's no on-off switch.
 
You can't just send someone to a training program and come out with a top-notch copywriter or a genius voiceover performer.
 
It's all a process.
 
And the process begins a long time before someone walks into a radio station or an advertising agency or even your business and says, posing with arms akimbo, "I am writer!"
 
Instead, they've spent their lives, walking around and bumping into things, wandering down the road less traveled, wondering "What the heck?", and asking questions.
                                                                               
 
AND THIS IS KEY
 
Good advertising writers are interested.
 
They have curiosity.
 
They want to know more.
 
They ask questions.
 
Then, when it comes time to write an ad, after they've asked all kinds of questions about what they're supposed to be selling, they have no problem sitting down writing endless awful advertisements for it.
 
 
ONE NEVER WRITES A GOOD AD BEFORE ASKING QUESTIONS AND WRITING CRAP
 
One big problem?
 
A lot of people stop at the crap.
 
They think it's good. They parade it around and people applaud.
 
Because maybe it's clever.
 
Maybe it seems like an advertisement.
 
But in reality, all it really is, is an ad-like object.
 
The world is filled with ad-like objects.
 
You see them and hear all the time.
 
And they make you feel nothing--unless they make you feel the wrong thing.
 
 
OFTEN THEY'RE FUNNY
 
And there's nothing wrong with funny advertising.
 
But funny is not the goal. Funny by itself makes the prospect feel the wrong thing.
 
The funny needs to be relevant.
 
The funny needs to connect with the sales message.
 
And this is one of the big challenges we face.
 
Especially in radio, there's a perception that advertising needs to be funny.
 
No!
 
Advertising needs to be relevant.
 
That doesn't mean it needs to be a "buy now, but wait, there's more, there's never been a better time to buy this baloney!" pitch fest.
 
 
AN INTERESTED PERSON UNDERSTANDS PSYCHOLOGY
 
Not formal psychology. I took psych 101 in college. It was awful. And was obviously taught by somebody badly in need of a psychologist.
 
We're talking practical psychology, or whatever else you want to call it. Mindset. Thinking. Makeup. Sensibility. Consciousness. Attitude. Feeling.
 
Ah, there's that word. "Feeling." How does the advertisement make the prospect "feel."
 
The interested copywriter understands this.
 
The interested copywriter understands the feelings of the person to whom they are speaking, and how to hit the emotional trigger that makes that prospect feel, "Here's the solution to my problem."
  
 
THAT'S PART OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
 
And that kind of emotional intelligence about the craft comes from spending life, walking around and bumping into things, wandering down the road less traveled, wondering "What the heck?", and asking questions.
 
It does not come from saying, "Hey, we're gonna write a funny ad that wins an award!"
 
Before anything else happens, the right person with the right attitude has to be at the helm of the great ship HMS Word Processor.
 
Fortunately for the indubitably frustrated Mr. Pollard in his radio station in Dryden, Ontario, Canada, North America, 49 degrees 47 minutes North, 92 degrees 50 minutes West, we will be getting around to a practical and concrete answer to his question next time. 

As always,
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

READY TO LEARN SOMETHING INTERESTING ABOUT SMALL BUSINESS IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE?
 
It's December 26.
 
It's the day after Christmas.
 
Boxing Day.
 
And I came to wish everyone happy Boxing Day!
 
Happy Boxing Day, everyone!
 
Of course, there's one small problem.
 
In the United States, from whence this screed originates?
 
 
WE DON'T CELEBRATE BOXING DAY
 
Yes, we were once part of the British Empire. That's apparently a common denominator for countries not of the UK that celebrate Boxing Day.
 
For what it's worth, Boxing Day is generally recognized as a day when postmen, errand-boys, and servants expect a Christmas-box from their respective employers. That info is just a click away!
 
Nonetheless, to this day, despite our heritage and the globe-spanning nature of the electronic climate in which we live, you say, "Boxing Day" to one of your fellow Americans, and you get a blank stare or a monosyllable like, "Hanh?"
 
Then again, due to the globe-spanning nature of the electronic climate in which we live, this screed has fans all around the world.
 
The thing is, I can't tell you where the screed's readers are other than the US and Canada. I'm not privy to that information.
 
So, to the Canadians, we can say, "Happy Boxing Day."
 
However, as for the podcast?
 
 
THE PODCAST ALSO HAS LISTENERS ALL AROUND THE GLOBE
 
Interestingly, according to the stats available from my syndication service, despite there being fans of the screed there, none of the podcast listeners are in Canada.
 
But one of those listeners is in the UK.
 
So, Happy Boxing Day, Mr. or Ms. UK Podcast Listener.
 
The podcast has more listeners in China. 

But since China was not part of the British Empire (unless you count Hong Kong), China does not celebrate Boxing Day.
 
But let's not discount Hong Kong.
 
Hello Hong Kong! If you're listening, Happy Boxing Day!
 
 
SO, THAT'S ABOUT THREE POSSIBLE PODCAST LISTENERS WHO CELEBRATE BOXING DAY
 
Here's where it gets interesting.
 
You know where the most listeners to the podcast version of the screed are, outside of the United States?
 
Drum roll, please...
 
Happy Boxing Day to all our listeners in Botswana!
 
You heard me.
 
Hot Shots has a fan base in Botswana.
 
Didn't see that one coming.
 
 
BOTSWANA USED TO BE A PART OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE
 
I did not know that.
 
My history of the British Empire is somewhat shaky.
 
So hello, Wikipedia!
 
Since its independence from the UK, Botswana has had one of the fastest growth rates in per capita income in the world.
 
Formerly one of the poorest nations in the world, it is now a middle-income country.
 
There's a high level of economic freedom.
 
The government maintains sound fiscal policy and a tiny amount of foreign debt.
 
Human rights are protected under the constitution.
 
 
AND, SMALL BUSINESS IN BOTSWANA IS A THING
 
Search "small business in Botswana," and Google does not disappoint.
 
One website (which looks like 2017 and not 1997) has an article called, "5 GREAT BUSINESS IDEAS FOR YOUTH IN BOTSWANA ."
 
They suggest Custom Made Clothing, Arts and Crafts, Magazine Publishing, Fast Food Franchise, and Baby Sitting Services.
 
An article on the top 20 reasons to do business in Botswana include everything from political stability, safety and security and lack of corruption to low levels of taxation, great technology and infrastructure, and a literate and skilled population.
 
 
LET'S START A BABY-SITTING BUSINESS IN BOTSWANA! WHO'S WITH ME?!
 
Hmm.
 
Kinda quiet out there.
 
Well, anyway, Botswana sounds like a Southern Africa garden spot.
 
So, to you in Botswana who are paying attention on this Boxing Day (which we understand you celebrate), Happy Boxing Day!
 
 
AND IF YOU'RE INCLINED TO SHARE, I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR BOTSWANA SMALL-BUSINESS SUCCESS STORY
 
Just send an email to submissions at slow burn marketing dot com.
 
To everyone else here in the US where Boxing Day remains largely a mystery, if you've got a small-business success story you'd like to share for possible inclusion here in the screed, feel free to use the same address.
 
Hope your Christmas was merry, your Hanukkah was happy, your Kwanzaa is capital, and if there's any other holiday that you celebrate, here's to that one as well.
 
See you again in the New Year. 

​As always,
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

IS BUD LIGHT STILL THE REAL BREW OF GENIUS?
 
Because beer always makes you smarter.
 
The Bud Light Real Men Of Genius radio campaign went away in 2008 after 7 inspired years.
 
It was epic, it made the brand a market leader, and was parodied endlessly (and badly) in small-business, local-radio advertising.
 
Since then, But Light has not had such a juggernaut--but today, they may be on the brink.
 
This morning, I was confronted with a video of a town crier standing inside a craft brewery in Minneapolis. He was reading a "Hear ye! Hear ye!" to everyone in the place.
 
It was a cease & desist letter from Bud Light to the craft brewer.
 
So, I thought, "Hold my beer. Watch this. I'm going to find out more."
 
The story is interesting, and it's a useful brand advertising lesson--even for the small-business owner.
 
 
"DILLY DILLY!"
 
Have you heard that? Have you said it?
 
I hadn't until this morning. I haven't been watching a lot of commercial TV lately.
 
But it seems that Bud Light and their agency, Wieden + Kennedy, is drafting off of the zeitgeist. In this particular case, it's the mania around Game of Thrones.
 
They've done it with a commercial that shows a royal banquet room, and a line of subjects paying obeisance to the king. As people step up and offer sixes and cases of Bud Light to the king, the king raises his own Bud Light and proclaims each person, "A true friend of the crown! Dilly, dilly!"
 
And everyone in the banquet room responds by raising their own Bud Lights and crying, "Dilly, dilly!"
 
This happens a couple of times, and then another gentleman steps up and offers a large brown bottle, without a label, and sealed with red wax. He puts it in front of the king, who says, "What, um, what is that?"
 
"This is a spiced honey mead wine that I have really been into lately."
 
 
WHAT FOLLOWS IS A LONG, UNCOMFORTABLE SILENCE
 
Then, the king says to the gent, "Please follow Sir Brad. He's going to give you a private tour of the Pit of Misery."
 
The hapless fellow is hauled off while everyone happily toasts, "To the misery! Dilly, dilly!"
 
The announcer chimes in over a shot of the Bud Light logo rendered in rice, barley, hops, and the head of a beer: "Here's to the friends you can always count on. Bud Light, brewed to be America's favorite light lager."
 
Oh, boy. Ya know what's going on here?
 
This is an attack ad.
 
Very funny. Really well produced.
 
But it's an attack ad.
 
 
IT'S TAPPING INTO THE GAME OF THRONES ZEITGEIST AND ATTACKING CRAFT BREWING
 
If you don't know, craft brewing has become HUGE.
 
It's huge enough that there are now three fundamental problems.
 
One, craft brewers are having a hard time competing with one another because there's so much competition and a limited market.
 
Two, consumers are suffering from FOMO, Fear Of Missing Out. When they look at a wall of craft beers in the liquor store, they become anxious and don't know what to buy, fearing they may be missing something better than what they'll choose.
 
And three, craft brewers are eating into big brewers' market share.
 
And I've got to be honest, as a guy who's been a fan of craft beers since they began bubbling up in the 1990s, even I'm over it. There are plenty of great beers out there. But the preciousness and the overtness and the slam-you-in-the-face-ness of so many of these beers is out of hand.
 
 
AND YES, I'M THE GUY WHO LAST WEEK THREW LAURELS TO A NANO-BREWER
 
Mad Fritz, the Napa Valley nano-brewery, is a brilliant brand.
 
It's not precious. It's intelligent and arcane and balanced and specialized and scarce.
 
But so many craft brewers are so clever and working so hard for people who are so pretentious about their beer.
 
I get it. This is the pendulum swinging the other way after decades of mega-brewery domination.
 
So...where's the attack?
 
One, the subject presents a precious bottle of spiced mead (which, if you don't know, is a honey wine).
 
Two, he presents the bottle with the cliché qualifier, "That I've really been into lately."
 
And three, the announcer says, "Here's to the friends you can always count on. Bud Light, brewed to be America's favorite light lager."
 
 
 A POX ON CRAFT BREW HEADS!
 
Long live the light lager!
 
Can you imagine any big brewer even five years ago using a line like, "America's favorite light lager."
 
They'd say, "Beer."
 
They'd use modifiers like, "light," or "crisp," or "refreshing."
 
They might say something unqualified like, "Beechwood aged!" (I once read an article by a reporter who called Budweiser to find out what "Beachwood aged" actually meant. The reply from the person at the other end was essentially, "Well, you know, beechwood. It's beechwood aged!")
 
Beer has been a commodity product.
 
 
AND NOW, COMMODITY THINKING IS BEING UNDERMINED BY ARTISAN THINKING
 
Regardless of how you feel about craft beer (I feel it's a good thing), it's not hard to see how this happened.
 
A landscape of fizzy yellow beers was infected by variety and flavor and choice and surprise.
 
Yes, craft beers are surprising. Not always in a good way. A top-fermented, dry-hopped ale that tastes of rosebuds, garlic and old gym socks may not be a good surprise.
 
Nonetheless, it has become a pervasive threat to the market dominance of brands like Bud Light, a brand whose core, die-hard fan is intolerant of things like craft beer. I know people like this. They are single-beer fanatics and they are angry at craft brewing.
 
Bud Light is shooting fish in a barrel--and being really funny.
 
 
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE TOWN CRIER?
 
Back to the brewery in Minneapolis.
 
The brewery is called Modist. Not sure how you pronounce it.
 
Modist very recently released a brew called, "Dilly Dilly Mosaic Double IPA."
 
Mosiac is a strain of hops. It is known for its complex and broad aromas backed by a clean bittering. If you care.
 
Modist put this brew in their taproom only. They did not release it widely.
 
They created a logo that said, "Dilly Dilly" in a blatant rip-off of the Bud Light swirl logo.
 
 
ON NOVEMBER 28, THEY ANNOUNCED IT ON THEIR FACEBOOK PAGE
 
They posted that they were releasing it on December 1.
 
The same day they released it, they posted a video of the town crier standing in their lobby, reading the cease & desist "proclamation" aloud.
 
The town crier's message included a request to make sure this ale was a one-time-only occurrence, and offers the brewery two free tickets to the 2018 Super Bowl in Minneapolis.
 
They next day, Modist posted a picture of the town crier's scroll and the "Dilly Dilly" ripoff logo, with the message, "Come drink this beer before we rename it 'Coat Tails.'"
I smell a publicity stunt cooked up by Anheuser Busch, whose parent company is not known for being so kind with its C&Ds.
 
Nonetheless, it's fun, it's well-crafted, it bears retelling, it's good advertising, and a good stunt for the press.
 
 
WHAT'S THE TAKEAWAY FOR YOU?
 
One, no business of any size is too small for a publicity stunt. I've done it with a tiny business, getting them coverage in a major metropolitan daily. You need to be creative, relevant, and interesting.
 
Two, your business can be a threat to the bigger market leaders. You just need to understand how to be different and resonant and offer your core customer a better reality.
 
And three, never discount the value of making the prospect feel the right thing. "Here's to friends you can count on." That is a simple, unsophisticated, artless sentiment--and it's going to sell a lot more beer than it deserves. It's also part of the Famous Among Friends conceit that Bud Light has been using for over 30 years.
 

BUD LIGHT APPEARED AT MODIST WITH GREAT ALACRITY 

The town crier was on the scene so quickly, and Modist was so on top of the situation, that it smacks of benign collusion. 

And the fact that Bud Light is acknowledging Modist in this way (and likely partnering with them) demonstrates that they probably aren't as down on craft beer as their advertising might imply.
 
Instead, they could be preparing to invest in Modist, if not preparing to buy them outright.
 
Seem unlikely?
 
Tell that to craft brewers Goose Island, Blue Point, Breckenridge, Golden Road, Four Peaks, 10 Barrel, Devils Backbone and Karbach--all of whom have been acquired by Anheuser Busch.  

Your brand is also never too small to be acquired by a giant. 
 
For a peek at "Dilly Dilly," Click here: https://youtu.be/D8Cb5Wk2t-8
As always,
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com
​

DID YOU TRY SOCIAL MEDIA ADVERTISING AND IT DIDN'T WORK?
 
Imagine that.
 
Just a different twist on the old chestnut, "I tried radio advertising and it didn't work!"
 
Well, did you know what you were doing?
 
Or did you ram your own uninformed agenda down the throat of whoever was trying to help you?
 
That is meant in the nicest possible way, of course.
 
And it's a rhetorical question not meant to implicate you, personally. You, of course, would never do that.
 
It's meant as a cautionary note to people we all know who have all the answers despite having none the training, experience, or insight to have an actual, informed opinion.
 
 
SO, WHY ARE WE HERE?
 
Why am I beating on the "I tried it and it didn't work" drum?
 
Because I'm tired of hearing things like, "Social media advertising doesn't work!"
 
I was just reading an interesting story from AdWeek.
 
The headline: "What National Geographic Did to Earn 3 Million Snapchat Discover Subscribers in Just 3 Months."
 
Subhead: "A new streamlined design plays up more photos and less text."     
 
OK. National Geographic. Talk about a chestnut.
 
Why on earth is one of the oldest, stodgiest, great-grandpa brands in the world mentioned in the same sentence as a frivolous, six-year-old social media nitwit platform that lost half a billion dollars last year?
 
 
BECAUSE MAYBE IT ISN'T AS MUCH FRIVOLOUS AS IT IS EFFECTIVE
 
The National Geographic Society is one of the world's oldest and largest non-profit scientific and educational institutions. (Thank you for that tidbit, Wikipedia, one of youngest and largest sources of potentially flawed information on the internet.)
 
The National Geographic Magazine, launched in 1888, has a global circulation of 6.5 million per month.
 
The National Geographic Channel is available to almost 90 million pay TV households in the US.
 
What the heck is National Geographic doing on Snapchat, a platform infamous for its use by disgraced US congressman Anthony Weiner as Weinervision?
 
Simple guess: National Geographic is looking for eyeballs and wants to be relevant to a younger generation.
 
And instead of being stodgy and poo-pooing social media, they are embracing Snapchat.
 
 
AND IT IS PROFITABLE
 
The article's subhead makes total sense in the age of the short attention span: "A new streamlined design plays up more photos and less text."
 
You're trying to reach people with no attention span who are watching a tiny screen in the palm of their hands.
 
More photos and less text just makes sense.
 
And it has to be pithy and intriguing.
 
Like the image of a purple microbe with the headline, "What are flesh-eating bacteria and how do you fight them?"
 
Yikes. Tell me more! Click.
 
But let's go back to the headline: "What National Geographic Did to Earn 3 Million Snapchat Discover Subscribers in Just 3 Months."
 
Are those 3 million Snapchat Discover subscribers actually doing them any good? It's Snapchat! A platform that loses more money than the territory of Guam has in its annual operating budget! More money than GEICO spends on their annual media buy!
 
 
THE NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC PEOPLE AREN'T STUPID
 
They hired an expert digital media executive away from digital giant Vox Media and did what needed to be done.
 
In a nutshell, Nat Geo's revenue from Snapchat is up by 58 percent.
 
Stephanie Atlas, who leads the Nat Geo digital team, says, "When you're competing against Cosmo and Kim Kardashian, you really have to think about a way to get people interested in what our value proposition is, which is strong visuals and piquing people's curiosity."
 
OK. My curiosity is piqued.
 
And I did something that, just 12 hours earlier, I swore to the Fabulous Honey Parker I would never do.
 
I downloaded Snapchat.
 
I created an account.
 
And I went in there.
 
 
AND I WAS COMPLETELY BAFFLED!
 
How do you use this thing?!
 
I fumbled around for a while. Then, lacking immediate access to a kid, I searched Google.
 
I found a blog post by one Emily Steck, who was a salve for my digitally frustrated self when she said, "For all the buzz and chatter around Snapchat, it's not a very intuitive platform. It's difficult to discover easily content or simply know where to find everything. Snapchat is a lot more complicated than it lets on."
 
Phew.
 
Anyway, I stumbled through for a bit, and finally found National Geographic.
 
"Could The Remains Of Santa Claus Be In This Turkish Church?" Intriguing music. Video inside a grand cathedral.
 
"Is This The world's Most Venomous Fish?" Underwater footage and eerie, dark music.
 
"Why Are Some Dogs More Aggressive?" A dog bares his teeth as a busy techno track burbles away.
 
They are being pithy making money.
 
 
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE SMALL-BUSINESS BRAND?
 
Can Snapchat work for a local business with a brick & mortar location?
 
I did some digging.
 
Found some evidence that yes, it's possible--despite the fact that the typical monthly ad spend on Snapchat is $40,000.
 
Take a nitroglycerine pill. Using local geofilters, a small business like a coffee shop can get away with an ad spend as low as 5 bucks.
 
But how do you do this?
 
I have no idea.
 
Because I do two things really well.
 
 
I HELP SMALL BUSINESSES CREATE EVOCATIVE BRANDS THAT CAN ATTRACT CUSTOMERS
 
And I can help market those evocative brands in ways that are often considered "Traditional."  
 
For anything else, I go to a specialist.
 
That's because I'm smart enough to know what I don't know.
 
I can dabble in digital.
 
But that's not my expertise.
 
And I don't want to become that fool who makes sweeping, uninformed judgments about new media platforms and sounds like the guy that used to make us crazy when I worked in a building full of radio experts: "I tried it and it didn't work!"
 
It didn't work because you are know-it-all whose fear- and ego-driven agenda is standing between you and advertising success.
 
 
NOT THAT I HAVE AN OPINION ON THIS
 
This is just fair warning to anyone who scoffs at social media advertising.
 
Since good radio advertising seems effortless, many people come at it and say, "How hard can it be?"
 
It's easy to just slap some random thing on the air. It's very hard to do well.
 
Social media advertising takes simplicity to a whole new level.
 
Never at any time in history has it been easier to place an advertisement.
 
And just because you can log on, open an account, and give them your credit card number and target your demographics to certain death doesn't mean you're doing it right.
 
In blog post entitled, "Snapchat marketing campaigns: 5 great case studies that produced results," Paul Roberts at Our Social Times says, "Success as a brand on Snapchat depends on knowing your audience, knowing the platform and knowing your product. Find the sweet-spot between all three and you could be onto a winner."
 
Want to be like a stodgy old heritage brand dating from the 19th century?
 
Find an expert and embrace social media. 

As always,
​
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

ARE YOU DILUTING YOUR PROFITABILITY?
 
If you’ve been here for any length of time, you know that the Fabulous Honey Parker and I are big fans of the F-word.
 
Focus.
 
Focus, focus, focus.
 
A relentless consistency and focus is the profit goblin of sharp minds.
 
Knowing that your brand is the one way your core customer should feel about your business can help drive a focused entrepreneur to big profitability.
 
But what happens when you split your brand focus?
 
 
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF DOING TWO THINGS REALLY WELL?
 
When you have two ways and two core customers?
 
Well, ain’t that a conundrum.
 
Ultimately, it depends upon how you handle it.
 
Here in town, there’s a photo gallery that specializes in big, dramatic landscapes.
 
Their work is stunning.
 
But mixed in with their landscape photography are some other stunning photos. These photos are of horses.
 
You could argue that they’re also landscape photos, as the horses are usually shot in the context of the landscape.
 
 
BUT YOU’D BE WRONG
 
Moreover, the photographers won’t argue that.
 
They know that the horse photography is off-brand.
 
Fortunately, it’s on-fleek.
 
OK, yes, I said that. And I’m sorry. So poke me with eyebrow tweezers.
 
Anyway, the horse photos are off-brand and still stunning. So, it works.
 
However…
 
While talking to one of the gallery owners, he said that in a perfect world, he’d have a second gallery up the street that specialized exclusively in the horse photography.
 
 
HE GETS HIS BRAND
 
He understands the one way the core customer should feel about his work.
 
And he knows that the horse images are speaking to a different core customer and engendering a different feeling.
 
Maybe someday, he’ll have that second gallery.
 
In the meantime, it doesn’t appear to be hurting his business.
 
He is focused and consistent enough.
 
He’s not the Grace L. Ferguson Airline & Storm Door Company. (Thank you, Bob Newhart.)
 
The brand survives the digression.
 
 
MANY BRANDS WOULD NOT SURVIVE
 
We recently did some work for a solopreneur who was rebranding her physical therapy business.
 
We’ll call her Margie Smith. That’s nothing like her real name.
 
Margie’s business was slow. To make ends meet while she built that business, she was doing some social media work on the side.
 
Ironically, the name of the physical therapy business was capable of being applied to the social media business.
 
So she did the smart thing.
 
She turned her business into the Margie Smith Physical Therapy Clinic & Social Media Agency.
 
 
SMART, RIGHT?
 
No. No it’s not. And it’s not what she did.
 
She started a separate business using the same name, focusing on social media. The physical therapy business remains separate and distinct.
 
No brand would survive such a split focus.
 
Recently, while visiting a winery in (of all places) Iowa, we were talking with the winemaker and tasting his wines--which were quite good.
 
But in the tasting room, he two different wine lists.
 
One was for his estate label. These were his tried and true wines. This brand was established and very formal. This was the wine upon which he had built his name.
 
The other label was for his experimental wines. These were the wines that he wasn’t sure he was going to keep around. But he found them good enough and interesting enough to put on the market.
 
 
SOME OF THEM WERE ARGUABLY STUNT WINES
 
Really, what else would you call a red-hot, spice-infused wine that can remain tasty while stripping the varnish off your throat?
 
It was impressive.
 
I salute anyone for trying something so ballsy.
 
And the wine sells--especially in bars favored by motorcycle riders, apparently. That’s one of the places where these wines are favored--because the brand name evokes power and energy and romance.
 
It seems unlikely that the hot pepper wine would ever be moved over to the estate brand.
 
If it did end up there, what would it do to the otherwise respectable, heritage brand he’s been building?
 
It would help undermine that brand.
 
 
THE ESTATE BRAND WOULD LOSE CREDIBILITY
 
And he knows that.
 
So instead of splitting the focus of his product line, he merely has two different brands, each a two different focus.
 
Over here is the stately brand.
 
And over there is the wild child brand.
 
Smart.
 
And not to pat ourselves on the back here at Slow Burn, but one of the million-dollar brands we helped build came as the result of relentless focus.
 
The business came to us wanting to advertise a particular service as part of their existing brand.
 
We said, “You could do that. But it’s a distinct specialty. And you’re going up against a national specialist brand in the category. So why not split it off and build a brand for that specialty?”
 
 
THEY DID. IT WORKED.
 
So, what about your business?
 
Do you do many things in your category?
 
Are you crushing it in those many things?
 
Or would it be smarter to take one of those things, split it off into a new category, and become the category’s 600-pound gorilla?
 
Understand, we’re not saying you should do it.
 
But it’s worth some introspection.
 
Because it could be that you’re doing seven things adequately, and one thing really well--and that one thing could be the ticket to building a monster brand.
 
Rowr. 

As always,

​Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

DO YOU REALLY HAVE ANY IDEA?
 
Do your employees?

Or your business partner?
 
You might be shocked and surprised, perhaps unpleasantly.
 
Earlier this year, the Fabulous Honey Parker and I announced a new project called CoupleCo.
 
This is a project by and about couple entrepreneurs--why they do it, why they love it, and how they keep a business going without killing each other.
 
CoupleCo is one reason we're out here on the road, crossing this great nation of ours in the Slow Burn Marketing Brand Response Unit. Besides visiting clients, we've been conducting interviews for CoupleCo.
 
Recently, we interviewed a couple who have been running a business together for about 8 years.
 
These are not kids. They are fully formed, middle-age adults who've been around and had successful careers of their own independent of each other.
 
 
TOGETHER, THEY HAVE BUILT A SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS
 
They are exactly the kind of people we like to interview.
 
In wrapping up an interview, we ask the subjects a series of quick questions  about each other.
 
With this particular couple, the exchange went something like this.
 
"OK, Bill. What is Jill's best quality?"
 
He says, "She has leaned to do this and such much better with more patience and insight, and she has become more thoughtful about the process."
 
She says, "You have no idea what you're talking about."
 
She then rebutted his entire answer.
 
Clearly, she was right.
 
He had an entire set of assumptions about something she was doing in the business, and he was dead wrong.
 
 
LET THIS BE A LESSON ABOUT ASSUMPTIONS
 
They are no substitute for actual communication. 
 
And actual communication is something that is frequently lacking inside of a small business--and can bite a brand in the butt, Bob.
 
Often, the lack of communication is basic.
 
A simple and common example: The receptionist says to the business owner, "I don't know what's going on, but the phone is suddenly ringing off the hook."
 
Business owner: "Oh! I forgot to tell you! We're running a new ad in the paper!"
 
Well, then.
 
And don't think this is uncommon. I can't count the number of times something like this happened when I worked in radio.
 
You spend a couple of weeks working with a client who's spending a few thousand to put together a radio promotion.
 
The radio commercial finally hits the air.
 
And you find out the business owner never bothered to communicate the promotion to the staff.
 
 
DON'T THINK THIS IS NECESSARILY SMALL IN SCOPE, EITHER
 
We've seen the person in charge not bother to communicate a new brand to the staff.
 
You know what happens then?
 
Revolt.
 
People who've been working under the old brand for years and loving it (even if the brand fits like a bad suit) become uncooperative and pissy.
 
They refuse to join the business in its brand evolution.
 
And eventually, the brand withers.
 
Conversely, we've seen a good explanation of a new brand to the team do astonishing things.
 
A workforce that was already doing a good and competent job suddenly becomes energized and ready to do things that are even bigger and better.
 
 
THE TROOPS BECOME GALVANIZED!
 
A good brand makes them rally around their leader and prepare to go forth and crush the competition!
 
But that works only if there's actual communication.
 
There is no substitute for having a message and being clear.
 
Communicating the brand and the advertising--the strategy and the tactics--is an essential step.
 
Imagine that commerce is a battlefield.
 
The brand's army is assembled there, ready to fight.
 
And the general standing before them suddenly looks at his cell phone, and wanders off to take a call from his wife.
 
And never comes back.
 
 
WHAT ARE THE TROOPS TO DO?
 
That's a lot of guys all dressed up, armed to the teeth, and scratching their asses.
 
That's an expensive proposition--and one that's destined to fail.
 
Without a mission and orders, those troops are going wherever they feel like--and that doesn't mean they're going to accomplish anything of value.
 
They need communication.
 
We've seen something as simple as a re-branding with clarity and purpose give the business owner a tool with which to marshal the troops, inspire them, and give them purpose in a business that was once muddled and without obvious direction.
 
But if clarity of communication is lacking?
 
 
THAT ENTIRE REBRANDING EFFORT WOULD BE POINTLESS
 
It would be a waste of time and money.
 
And who has enough of either?
 
At its most basic, communication keeps everyone on the same page with a clear of idea of mission and goals.
 
The receptionist doesn't wonder why the phone is suddenly ringing.
 
The salespeople don't look like idiots when a customer says he wants the offer from the radio.
 
And your wife doesn't look at you during a recorded interview and say, "You have no idea what you're talking about."

Talk to each other. It's more profitable. 

As always,
​
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com
​

BIG DOGS, BIG LIES?
 
If you've been hanging around here for any length of time, you're sick of hearing us say it.
 
Your brand is the one way your Core Customer should feel about your business.
 
One way, because focus is essential.
 
Feel, because all decisions--including buying decisions--are made emotionally and justified later.
 
Core Customer because, when you understand the one person to whom you're speaking, you understand how to be resonant and relevant.
 
With that in mind, allow us to look at that simple, ground-corn product, the humble tortilla chip.
 
Specifically, let's look at a small, regional brand here in the west that goes by the name, Juanita's.
 
 
JUANITA'S IS A TORTILLA CHIP OF DISTINCTION
 
This is a chip that one might refer to as "restaurant-style."
 
It's a rustic product made of stone-ground yellow corn, a trace of lime, vegetable oil, salt and water.
 
Juanita's is a classic American success story.
 
An immigrant Mexican family moves to Hood River, Oregon.
 
In the 1970s, they rent a room and start making mom's authentic, Mexican-style corn tortillas to sell in local markets.
 
One by one, the family members leave their other jobs and work in the tortilla factory.
 
Today, they're huge in a regional kind of way.
 
If you want to read the story, it's on their website.
 
On the bag, there is a topline version of the story:
 
"To make a great tasting tortilla chip,
you first need to know how to make
a great tortilla. For over 50 years our
mother has prepared fine, authentic
Mexican meals insisting on only the
finest ingredients. And for over 26
years our family has brought to the
public the same dedication to quality
with the brand named after
her .... Juanita's."
 
 
WHEN THE FABULOUS HONEY PARKER AND I THROW A PARTY, THIS IS OUR GO-TO CHIP
 
We serve it with a homemade salsa cruda, which is basically a mix of chopped tomatoes, onions, peppers, cilantro, salt and lime juice all stirred up in a bowl.
 
Our guests scarf it down. And someone always asks, "What kind of chips are these? They're great."
 
We show them the simple bag with its red and green logo that looks like the signage off an old Los Angeles taco joint. They nod and crunch.
 
Last week, when I went to buy Juanita's for our traditional July 4th barbecue at the Mountaintop Marketing Fortress...
 
The supermarket was out.
 
On the shelf, there was an enormous void where our beloved Juanita's usually live.
Holiday locusts had descended ahead of me.
 
I began perusing the alternatives. There were a couple of brands that seemed equally rustic and unsophisticated in their branding.
 
But I looked at one that seemed especially relevant.
 
 
LA COCINA DE JOSEFINA
 
I already knew the story of Juanita's Horatio Algero roots.
 
I looked at the bag of chips from La Cocina De Josefina, and it seemed equally unsophisticated.
 
A simple drawing of a Mexican woman rolling out a tortilla by hand.
 
Turning the bag over, it was not dissimilar to Juanita's:
 
These tortilla chips are made
with the simple ingredients of
corn, oil, salt... and love, ---
because we believe that every
bag of La Cocina de Josefina chips
is an invitation. To share. To
connect. To come together with
people who are important to you.
Made right here in the Pacific
Northwest, we care greatly about
the product we create for you,
and make sure to only use quality
ingredients. The result is a flavorful
tortilla chip that we think you'll
find simply delicious. So grab
some friends, open a bag
and enjoy!
 
 
SOLD AMERICAN!
 
With the dearth of Juanita's, two bags of Josefina's went into the cart.
 
The salsa was a hit. People scarfed down 97% of it using a bag and a half of chips.
 
The next evening, I was sitting with the leftover chips, considering how much they tasted like a Fritos corn chip. Could Josefina have displaced Juanita in my chip repertoire?
 
Looking at the bag, it seemed odd that there was no website listed in the labeling.
 
Wondering about Josefina's heritage, I googled her chips.
 
Dear God, what have I done!
 
This rustic tortilla chip, made with the simple ingredients of corn, oil, salt, and love...
 
Is a poseur!

Or, as they would say in Spanish, "Presumido!"
 
The chips from La Cocina De Josefina are made not with love at all, but with filthy corporate lucre!
 
 
JOSEFINA'S CHIPS AND HER SIMPLE DRAWING OF HER ROLLING OUT A TORTILLA...
 
...are a product of Frito-Lay, Inc.!
 
Be still my heart!
 
Nowhere on the packaging is there any indication of this relationship.
 
The closest they come to any admission is in the address:
 
Made in Vancouver, Washington
for La Cocina de Josefina by
Cocina Autentica, Inc.
4808 NW Fruit Valley Rd.
Vancouver, WA 98660
 
Google that address, and you get a map of Frito Lay's Vancouver production plant.
 
But why? 

Why this lie by omission?
 
 
FOR EXACTLY THE REASON INDICATED AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS SCREED
 
The Frito-Lay marketing department knows that a brand is the one way the Core Customer should feel about the business.
 
One way, because focus is essential. They have focused on creating what seems to be a family-owned brand of chips.
 
Feel, because all decisions--including buying decisions--are made emotionally and justified later. And any simple chip "made with love" is a viable substitute for the absent Juanita.
 
And Core Customer because they want to have a voice that is resonant and relevant. They understand they are speaking to someone who appreciates the rustic family nature of Juanita's brand. Understanding how this person feels about Juanita's helps them matter in this person's quest for chips over, say, Tostitos.
 
But why have they done this?
 
Why has this big dog perpetrated this big lie by omission?
 
 
THIS IS A CORPORATE STRATEGY
 
Publicly, they say that they don't mention Frito-Lay because it is a regional product only. Frito-Lay is a national brand.
 
But dig a little deeper, and you find that Frito-Lay has a new strategy of going after strong regional brands.
 
And wisely, they look at someone like me, who's a fan of my regional brand. They know that in no way would I, in looking for a substitute for my Juanita's, buy a product from a subsidiary of a $75 billion company.
 
But the small-brand BS stamped on the back of their bag, along with the homespun look of the package, is exactly what they know I will respond to.
 
I have been played!
 
And this proves exactly why Slow Burn Marketing insists that as a small business in the 21st century, being competitive in one's marketplace requires understanding what it means to have an evocative brand.
 
 
THIS BIG DOG HAS DONE NOTHING ILLEGAL
 
But they have concocted an implicit lie of a brand in an effort to squeeze out a little guy.
 
Is it fair?
 
Absolutely.
 
Do I have anything against Frito-Lay?
 
Absolutely not.
 
Am I glad to have been duped like this?
 
You betcha.
 
Because not only does it make me a smarter consumer.
 
 
IT ALSO GIVES ME GRIST FOR THE SCREED MILL
 
Like so much yellow corn being stoneground for tortilla chip slurry, we have a salty object lesson for the small-business marketer.
 
If you brand well, and you build your business, you can become a threat to the big dogs.
 
If you were around a few weeks ago when we talked about Dollar Shave Club and their acquisition by Unilever last year for a billion dollars cash, that's another example of threat management.
 
Wisdom on the street is that Unilever paid far more than the brand was worth just to prevent someone else from buying it.
 
Most of us will never be big enough to inspire fear and big-money attacks or acquisitions.
 
Some will. There are a few followers of the screed who will make it happen.
 
But by understanding why branding works and knowing how to throw an emotional dart at the heart of your customer, no matter how small you are, you can win big in your marketplace.
 
Mere component parts like corn, oil and salt are beaten into the ground by the idea of love.
 
Even if it's all a lie.

​As always,
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com

WHY ARE WE CHEERING A BRITISH INVASION?
 
Yes, it is July 4, 2017. In the United States, we are celebrating our declaration of independence from the United Kingdom.
 
Last week, our neighbors in Canada celebrated their sesquicentennial (that's the 150-year anniversary for all you civilians) of their independence from the UK.
 
No doubt, many Americans today are wishing they could move to Canada for more than just celebration.
 
But we here at the Mountaintop Marketing Fortress are not going there.
 
We will not make this a political screed. We never have. We never will. Because politics is just too divisive.
 
We are inclusionists.
 
We like to invite everyone to celebrate.
 
Celebrate what?
 
Almost anything!
 
Which explains today's celebration.
 
 
WE ARE CELEBRATING A BRIT WHO CHANGED THE SHAPE OF AMERICAN ADVERTISING
 
Indeed, as creators of advertising, it's hard for us to not appreciate a man who famously said, "Talent, I believe, is most likely to be found among nonconformists, dissenters, and rebels."
 
And is there anything more American than an appreciation for nonconformity, dissent and rebellion?
 
Well, yeah, there is the national pastime of banging the drum for nonconformity, dissent and rebellion while making sure it conforms, agrees and complies.
 
"Let's all be different by dressing alike and indulging fanatical groupthink about the same stupid idea! Woo-hoo!"
 
But I digress.
 
 
REBELLION IS THE GAME THAT GAVE THE U.S. ITS INDEPENDENCE
 
And this Brit, the son of a Gaelic-speaking Scottish Highlander, was fascinated by the American character.
 
Back in the middle of the 20th century, in the days before the mayhem and the menace of the over-communicated digital culture, this man was an iconoclast, a subversive, a revolutionary.
 
He came to the U.S. banging the drum for a sea change in advertising.
 
In an age of the hard sell, he made a convincing pitch for the soft sell.
 
And his soft sell built brands with ferocious intensity. He won more major advertising accounts than any ad man before or since.
 
He never won any advertising awards for creativity. He didn't believe in them. 
The idea of an industry's creative people giving awards to each other left him cold. He always maintained that if something didn't sell, it wasn't creative.
 
 
I COULD ARGUE THAT IF IT DOESN'T SELL, IT MIGHT BE STILL BE CREATIVE--IT JUST ISN'T RELEVANT
 
But why parse words with a genius? He'll always run rings around you logically.
 
And this man's particular genius is responsible for so much of what we do in our business that wins friends and influences people.
 
He changed advertising using his soft-sell methods combined with research.
 
Research!
 
Yes, that pox, research, always a nuisance, a bother and a misery to so many creative people.
 
In a famous quote, he said, "Advertising people who ignore research are as dangerous as generals who ignore decodes of enemy signals."
 
 
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN HE LOOKED DOWN UPON CREATIVE
 
Remember, he was all about the talented nonconformists, dissenters, and rebels.
 
In fact, despite being an enormously successful businessman, he disdained businessmen who lacked the ability to be creative.
 
This man famously said:
 
The creative process requires more
than reason. Most original thinking
isn't even verbal. It requires "a groping
experimentation with ideas, governed
by intuitive hunches and inspired by
the unconscious." The majority of
business men are incapable of original
thinking because they are unable to
escape from the tyranny of reason.
Their imaginations are blocked.
 
 
BLAMMO! TAKE THAT, BLOCKED BUSINESSMAN!
 
Talk about potentially biting the hand that feeds you.
 
Who makes the decision to hire an advertising agency?
 
A businessman!
 
But then, don't Americans like to imagine themselves as the outlier, the nonconformist, the rebel?
 
"He's right! Let's be rebellious and hire the creative guy! Yay, we're nonconformists! Let's start dressing like nonconformists and pretending we're the new originals!"
 
But one of the most significant pieces of ad think propagated by this rebellious Brit regards branding.
 
And interestingly, "branding" is not a word that you hear him use a lot.
 
But when you look at his track record of iconic brand development, he was a king.
 
 
HE SPECIALIZED IN MAKING THE PROSPECT FEEL ONE WAY ABOUT THE PRODUCT
 
In fact, he called it essential to winning. He said:
 
There isn't any significant difference
between the various brands of whiskey,
or cigarettes or beer. They are all about
the same. And so are the cake mixes and
the detergents, and the margarines...
The manufacturer who dedicates his
advertising to building the most sharply
defined personality for his brand will
get the largest share of the market at
the highest profit.
 
We at Slow Burn might argue that this thesis becomes shaky when applied to various small-businesses with whom we work. Because many of them really are different than the competitors. 
 
Nonetheless, the core concept--that the most sharply defined and most attractive personality wins--is one with which we have no argument whatsoever.
 
Hands down, we have seen it work for our clients. We have even seen it inspire the competition to scramble and regroup in an effort to redefine their own personality--with laughable results.  
 
 
AND, THIS BRIT EVEN USED AN EXPRESSION NEAR AND DEAR TO THE FABULOUS HONEY PARKER'S HEART
 
He said something which is not only similar to a phrase she uses repeatedly, but is an idea which is uniquely American.
 
Honey loves a good sports story, and likes to talk about helping our clients "Knock it out of the park."
 
And lemmetellya, that is fun to do.
 
And this Brit liked to say, "Don't bunt. Aim out of the ball park."
 
And then he said, "Aim for the company of immortals."
 
Aim for the company of immortals.
 
I just got chills.
 
And interestingly, the Brit was also realistic about this. 
He wasn't about winning at all costs. He had perspective and balance.
 
He also said, "Play to win, but enjoy the fun."
 
 
WE HAVE A RULE HERE AT SLOW BURN MARKETING
 
We've repeated it here before.
 
We will do business only with people whom we'd look forward to joining for dinner.
 
Life is too short. We will not take a client just for the money.
 
It has to be a good fit.
 
They, like us, have to play to win but enjoy the fun.

Interestingly, this describes not only the person who hired us, but every single person we met when we were engaged in a branding effort for a division of Wells Fargo. 

HARD TO IMAGINE--BUT TRUE 
And finally, one of the most practical quotes from our British invader.
 
It is just as piercing and relevant now as it was then. 
​
And it speaks to a mindset seen too often in the hucksterish sales messages that come at us over the airwaves and through the ether.
 
This man was adamant that, "The consumer is not a moron. She is your wife. Try not to insult her intelligence."
 
On this Independence Day, a salute to you, David Ogilvy.
 
Here's to being fascinated by Americans, to burning it up with the soft sell, and to nonconformity, dissension, and rebellion.
 
Tally ho.
As always,
Blaine Parker
Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in
Park City
www.slowburnmarketing.com
​